saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
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