My girlfriend figured out who you are.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
