Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
