my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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