so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize
