yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Randomize
