More tranny stories later!
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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