Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
even my farts smell like vagina
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize
