You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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