he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
