: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
My vagina is very pro this idea
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
