I'm really into asian looking animals
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
