who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
