Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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