I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
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