My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Randomize
