is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Randomize
