wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Randomize
