Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
OPIZZABONMYDICK
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
