I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
