That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
