Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
