he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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