i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
