I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
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