"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
