thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
