It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
