At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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