just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
My bed smells like the plague
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Randomize
