I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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