trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
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