I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
