I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
