Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Girls should come with a carfax report
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Randomize
