Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
the gays at disneyland are vicious
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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