I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
