Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
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