Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
