Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
tell me about the fingering
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
