I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize