I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
