people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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