Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
