do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
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