long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
