You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize