we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
You're like the curious george of whores
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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