do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
