i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I still have a little drunk in my system
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
